Smile-breaks
Upgrades and other nonsense
Five years ago. . . Make that ten. . . my iPhone was reasonable. Google was reasonable. Everything did what it was supposed to do and if I changed something in Settings, sometimes it actually helped. We got along just fine. Well, sort of just fine. Since then there have been hundreds of upgrades and not one of them made my life easier. Mostly they just messed with what I was using perfectly well.
And now we have AI - Artificial Intelligence. It's invaded my iPhone—via an upgrade I'm sure. I almost replied to Mr.? Mrs.? Artificial Intelligence, aka AI, the other day. I was going to tell it to quit being so nosy because after it gives me good information, it starts asking me really personal questions like, "Could you tell me more about what part of your body has the rash and how long you've had it?"
How do you know it was my rash I was asking about? It's none of your business whose rash it is or where it was. When I asked about the best times to drink water to stay hydrated all day, AI answered the question. But that wasn't the end of it. It said it would help to know if I had a specific daily water goal. And what did I have planned in the way of intense workouts during the day? That last one was a relief—AI doesn't know me very well if it's asking me about intense workout plans.
Not to be outdone by a robot of sorts, I lay in bed the other night, plotting to put AI on the spot. "So, AI, what is your favorite sport?" I asked it the next morning. It gave the usual, American football is the favorite spectator sport in the U.S. and listed the other top favorite sports in the U.S.
I kicked back, "Not our favorite—your favorite. AI's favorite." Gotcha! I said to myself as I waited for its answer. How could AI have a favorite anything?
Smart aleck came back with a discourse on AI's not having personal feelings, etc. but then said if it "had to choose a sport based on what is the most fascinating to analyze, it would be chess." Dang!
I'm not one to give up. I tried again, "To AI: What do you do for fun?" Answer: "I do not experience fun, boredom, or personal feelings," but not to be outdone, AI went on to say it's "at my best" when processing data, solving problems, etc. Of course.
I thought some more. How could I get to him? Okay. "Do AIs have AI friends?" Nope! They don't have personal lives, feelings, or friends, was the answer. They do have "functional data transfers rather than social relationships." How warm and cozy. . .
What it said next threw me for a loop. AI doesn't have AI friends, but it told me 10% of young adults say they have an ongoing friendship with an AI chatbot and 18% of adults under 30 consider a chatbot an ongoing personal friend. Wha-a-a-t? Do they invite them to their parties? Do they meet up for coffee?
Bye! I'm going for coffee with a friend—a real friend. No phones or browsers allowed. See you next week! After I ask AI what it thinks of my Smile-breaks. . .